My Bipolar Day

        Let me just start off by saying, I don't cope well with stress. I push people away, and I get really uptight, and I cry very easily. So, today was one of the most nerve-racking, stressful days of my life. I was hearing from one of my top schools: University of Colorado at Boulder. Of course, I drove myself crazy thinking the worst of things, getting annoyed at family members, and having breakdowns...you know? The usual.
       Boulder Representative knew that I was on edge, so they told me that I could call today (instead of tomorrow when the first bunch of application decisions went out). Obviously, I did. But before I did, I had to go through my entire day of school to find out what my decision is. I went to school today wearing my Boulder sweatshirt, hoping that would bring me good luck, but everyone told me it is a curse and that you should. But thank goodness, I am not superstitious. The last pert of my day was the worst though. I spent my entire last period hysterical and hyperventilating over my math grade. I have a 78% in the class, and I am not happy about it. Yes, to some people, a 78% is a good grade, but I have not had a C in a class since I was in third grade (I absolutely hated the teacher, so I purposely did poorly on everything in her class hoping that she would realize that I hated her, but all that did was just hurt me, and I quickly learned my lesson).
          So I went to my math teacher to ask if I could get an extra assignment that would help my grade. Math Teacher said, "It's against school policy." I completely understand that, but there is one loophole. Math Teacher gives us assignments in class that are apparently supposed to be "formative." At my school we have two types of grading: formative and summative. Formative is when a student takes a quiz and is allowed to retake it, and summative is when the grade is final. Well, I know I have flaws in my grade causing the C+ I have in the class, but I know that my grade should be higher than that. Back to the formative assignments Math Teacher gives. Before tests or quizzes, Math Teacher gives us a worksheet or study guide to help study for the upcoming exams. That isn't the problem though. The worksheets Math Teacher gives us never count. Never. That's what annoys me to know end. I forgot to do my homework one time in class, and it was the one time he checked for homework. I always do my homework for Math. It is important for me to do the homework because it does help e for the future. Whatever, I was penalized for not doing that one homework, but I am never rewarded for the homework that he assigns and I actually do do. So between the "Formative Assessments" and the homework grades, my grade in Math Teacher's class should be at least an 80% with what I do for his class.
        Ironically, today in class we had a worksheet, so I asked (in front of the class) if this could be counted for a grade. Math teacher's answer? No. Flat out no. Math Teacher didn't even think twice about it. So MT told me to stay after class to discuss everything that was going on. Meanwhile, sitting in class, knowing my grade, I was hysterical crying. I walked out of the room and into the bathroom shaking and crying. I was already on edge from hearing from Boulder after school, and this little "episode" wasn't helping my situation. The last period of the day took forever. Like dragged on for what felt like two hours. So the bell rang, and I walked right up to him (still hysterical crying, I might add) and told him my situation on why I was so on edge. So I asked if there was anything I could do to help my grade, and really there was nothing. So whatever. MT finally gave in to help me a little bit with my grade, so I have the opportunity to bring up my grade, but I am still annoyed by the way grading is in class. But, anyway, I am moving on from that since MT considered to help after I put up a fight.
        Boulder Rep told me to call anytime after school, because any if it were any earlier, I would not be able to find out. So I was too hysterical to call right after school as I planned. I had pilates after school with my mom so I called her hysterical while driving to pilates to tell her I was on my way there. She thought the worst automatically, and thought that I was crying because of Boulder (which I had yet to call). I explained to her my situation in the car and had another melt down because I had to still call Boulder Rep about my application status. So I got to my pilates teacher's house, and calmed myself down enough to call Boulder.
        I have never felt my heart pound harder then it did. I felt like I was going to toss my cookies all over the place (common theme creative writing class?). I was on hold, shaking, hearing that stupid, "All our representatives are busy at the moment. They will be on the line with you shortly." Well shortly felt too long. I felt like I was on the phone for a half hour, and no one was answering. So I hung up and called again. The first thing I did was click zero to go right to a representative. It worked.
This is how the conversation went:
Me: "Hi, my name is KB, and I would like to know the status of my application."
Rep: "Oh, absolutely, just one moment please."
Me: "Thank you!"
...a silence on the phone. I thought that she had hung up and almost hung up, but right before I did she answered. I heard a large gasp, and I felt pretty nervous at this point.
Rep: "Congratulations, you're in!"
        I could honestly tell you, an eighty pound weight was lifted off of my shoulder. I have never been so happy on a phone call my entire life.  The thoughts about MT have gone from my mind, and guess what?!
I AM NOW A CU BOULDER BUFF!!!!